E-mail updates
Follow on Twitter
Subscribe to RSS
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
13-year-old Matthew Kolen, who was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome at age eight, hugs his mother Suzanne at their home in Long Island, New York on March 30, 2012. Matthew's diagnosis will soon be dropped in the fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders or DSM-5, the American Psychiatric Association's diagnostic reference book, to be subsumed into the broader category of autism spectrum disorder.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Suzanne Kolen watches her son Matthew as he prepares to blow out candles on his 13th birthday cake at his home in Long Island on June 4, 2012.
Reuters reports — Struggling to describe her son, Suzanne Kolen of Long Island, New York, uses a friend's recent description: He's the 13-year-old boy bouncing down the road in the rain looking very much like Winnie the Pooh's friend, Tigger.
"He's a genuinely happy kid," Kolen says of her son, a bright boy who loves nature and paleontology and has never been defined by his diagnosis of Asperger's syndrome, a mild form of autism marked by social awkwardness and narrow interests that make personal relationships challenging.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew sits in a room inside his house after returning from school on April 16, 2012.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew looks into his fish tank on May 16, 2012.
Like many on the autism spectrum, Matthew finds it difficult to make eye contact. "I can't stare into someone's eyes," he says. "It just hurts."
Kolen says her son still struggles with the give and take of conversation. "It's very difficult for him to allow the other person to speak. He still tends to dominate."
But Matthew is bright, and she believes with enough practice, he will learn how to respond appropriately to social cues, even if he's "a little rough around the edges."
"My goal is to make sure that in the end, he has a place to work, earning a living and supporting himself in what he loves to do," says Kolen.
Read the full story: What's in a name? Losing Asperger's label not such a big change
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew, right, plays with a friend during his bar mitzvah in Melville, New York on June 16, 2012.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew's chore list, posted on the refrigerator at his home in Long Island, on March 30, 2012.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew, left, hugs his brother Russell after blowing out the candles on his 13th birthday cake on June 4, 2012.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew practices Taekwondo in Long Island on April 16, 2012.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew eats breakfast as his medication sits nearby at his house in Long Island on March 30, 2012.
Shannon Stapleton / Reuters
Matthew laughs as his brother Russell plays before leaving for school on March 30, 2012.
Leave a Comment:
where's dad? in all of these situations where's dad? Seems the father always haas a high income job, nice shack, ineffective with the kid. Dad gets off the hook. Mom becomes the problem no focus other then shielding the kid, not getting the outside help needed (which financially they can afford). If there are other children they always are put to the side, expected to just accept that thier entire life growing up that mom's busy with sibling is that fair? it seems in all these tragedies that they don't use the resources that were available.
ie. Newton 289,000 per year + medical expenses. isolation & or denial NEVER is the solution
Nothing in this post indicates that this child is not getting the help he needs and this child is not a tragedy! Asperger's Syndrome is not an illness. It will not "go away" with therapy or medication. Therapies and medications can help the child navigate the "social" requirements of the world in able to be able to participate more fully in society. Dad could be anywhere- even behind the camera. He might even be an "aspie" himself, as there is often a familial connection. Many Asperger's Syndrome kids grow up to be successfulI ( I can point to quite a few physicians and college professors). If this boy were diabetic or had spina bifida would you complain that the other child did not get the attention needed? Life isn't always fair to siblings, or anyone else and most families do the best they can with the hand that is dealt to them.
There is nothing wrong with this kid. As someone with Asperger's I can tell you that it IS difficult to be social and navigate in a world that doesn't readily accept differences of any kind in others. Give him the respect he deserves as a person and individual, support and help him along when he needs it and above all accept his differences as a wonderful part of who he is. He'll do just fine in life.
where is dad every time i see one of these stories colo. conn well off households absent dads mom gives over her life they get no effective help they all have big incomesgood educations yet this is how it ends up poor kids just wind up in jail and become jailhouse bait. it took until after ww1 to pass child labor laws when if ever are we going to get our act together
o.k. so...you seem to know "everything" about every family with a child with a disability. Well, you don't. You can't just lump everyone into the "I make a lot of money/the dad is absent and mom does everything/this family didn't get the help their child needed" category.
You obviously haven't seen my story...my 12 year old son with autism was severely autistic at 18 months and is now considered high functioning at 12. MY HUSBAND and I have been involved and hands-on with his therapies, schools, teachers, doctors etc since 18 months of age. My husband (and me) has been to every doctor appointment, therapy appointment, meeting with the school district, parent/teacher conference, you name it (and not just for our 12 yo with autism but he's been at everything for our other 2 typically developing kids too).
Our 12 yo with autism is a very gentle, loving, intelligent child who is now at a private school for children with disabilities, paid for NOT BY US but by the school district who agreed that this school was the best placement for him, that felt this school better met his needs than the public school in our town. (This all follows special education law by the way...school districts pay for the education of their students who attend what's called out-of-district placements or in other words, schools and programs that are not part of the public school district). My son is now talking about going to college once he is in the post-high school program at his private school. He wouldn't be doing as well as he is if not for me AND MY HUSBAND's hard work. My husband makes good money but not the kind of money those in much more affluent areas of the country make yet we have somehow managed to pay for private speech therapy, private occupational therapy, biomedical treatments and other things not covered by our insurance or not initially offered to our son by his school.
I chose to be a stay-at-home mom when my first child (age 14) was born. I don't sit around eating bon-bons all day...I have 3 kids, ages 14, 12 and 8, who have a myriad of activities that both MY HUSBAND and I take them to and participate in. My husband is the Cub Master of the Cub Scout pack in our town (our 8 yo is a Cub Scout) and he is an Asst. Scoutmaster with the Boy Scout troop in our town (our 12 yo with autism is a Boy Scout). I have been a Girl Scout leader for a decade and I have run the special education parent advocacy group in my town now for 3 years. I have taken classes to become an educational advocate and will start that as a professional job very soon.
So don't just go assuming that every situation has an absent dad, a mom who has everything dumped on her, a kid whose parents did nothing or not enough for them etc, etc. While I agree that there are situations of late that suggest that the parents could have done more, your comments just tick people like me off who bend over backwards for their kids and do whatever is needed to get them the help they need.
...
In much respect, the father may have said no Photo's of me. But, in other words. This symdrone is serious its not just one kid..it could be others...you don't know..Our Reduction of proudtion is at risk so get checked. The Mom is trying..how would you feel??? thank you
This really concerns me. If my son's diagnosis is no longer accepted, does that mean we have to get him re-diagnosed for him to continue to receive benefits? How can they just all of a sudden decide that it is not an accepted syndrome?